


just hold on

by fruitsofanarchy



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Angst, Child Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Keith is a pirate, Keith is his first mate, Lance is a pirate, M/M, Slight fluff, he's the captain, it's mostly just angst, mentions of Lance's family - Freeform, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-05-16 21:34:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14819282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fruitsofanarchy/pseuds/fruitsofanarchy
Summary: Lance has a bad dream.Pirate AUWARNING: There is child abuse/abuse in this story. If you are easily triggered by that, PLEASE do not read. I want people to be safe.





	just hold on

**Author's Note:**

> I know I've said this all over this story, but there is child abuse in here.
> 
> I wrote this story for my own enjoyment. I originally wrote this as a starter for roleplaying and such, but then I started really exploring it in an rp with my friend. I was struck with inspiration yesterday, so I figured I might as well write it, right?

For as long as Lance could remember, his family had been deeply rooted into piracy. He didn’t know why, but his father was a pirate, as was his father before him, and as was  _ his _ father, and so on and so forth. For nearly five whole generations, the McClain family had been living on the high seas. His parents were, at some point, killed by enemy pirates, leaving Lance orphaned in an unforgivable environment. Now, Lance was next in line. His father had been a ruthless, evil, and downright mean captain, and Lance was expected to be the same. But… that just wasn’t him.

 

Lance couldn’t bring himself to kill prisoners. He would pillage, be ruthless when he had to… but he hated it. Of course, he was raised to be just like his father, so it was mostly said around the ship that the former Captain McClain failed. Nobody would dare say that to Lance’s face though, as he was definitely not above punishing his own crew, and had proved that time and time again. However, there was one crew member that Lance couldn’t bring himself to hurt no matter how many times he was disrespectful- which he was. A lot. There was just something about Keith.

 

There were rumors that Keith was punished in a  _ different _ way. Similar to the way the former captain would punish his children whenever they acted out of line. Keith would often emerge from the Captain’s office with new bruises and small marks. There was talk. But, of course, nobody said anything about it. At least not to the captain’s face, or Keith’s. That would mean certain death. They both had awful tempers, and nobody really wanted to deal with that. So for the most part, the crew let it be, and they didn’t bother the two of them alone.

 

Lance was sitting in his cabin office, going over some maps. They needed a new course to go on, hopefully to find some uncharted territory to explore or something. Lance was bored with what they were doing. There was a knock on the door as he was working. “Come in,” he called, his voice scratchy with sleep deprivation. Not even a moment later, the door swung open to reveal his hot headed first mate. “Keith,” he greeted, barely bothering to flick his eyes up to look at him.

 

“Captain.” Luckily, Keith knew not to get too snappy or disrespectful towards Lance, especially when they were alone. “We need to talk.”

 

“Okay, talk.”

 

“You need sleep. You’re like a walking zombie or something. If we get into any trouble, you aren’t going to be able to protect your crew.”

 

“My crew can protect themselves, Keith. I have higher expectations for them than that. After all, if they aren’t able to fight, they’d make a damn useless pirate.”

 

“You need sleep,” Keith repeated, sitting on the edge of the desk. Neither of them mentioned that blatant disrespect. Lance dropped his pen and finally looked up at him, leaning back in his chair a little bit with his arms crossed over his chest.

 

Lance raised his eyebrow a little bit. “Mhm. Is there a real reason you’re here Keith, or is that just it, because I really need to be getting back to work.”

 

Keith sighed and glanced away for a moment, fingers drumming nervously on the desk. “I think people are getting suspicious,” he finally confessed.

 

“Suspicious of what?” Even though Lance really already knew what he was going to say.

 

“Us. You and me.”

 

Lance was silent for a moment. “Well, I guess they’ll just have to be suspicious.”

 

“But Lance, what if they find out?”

 

“They won’t do anything, Keith. They can’t. I’m their captain, you’re my first mate.”

 

“There’ll be a mutiny.”

 

“Then I guess we better not get caught.” Lance had a wicked smile on his face as he spoke, one that Keith knew all too well. There was no point in arguing with him anymore, Keith knew, so he didn’t try. But that didn’t stop him from changing the subject.

 

“You still need sleep.”

 

Lance waved his hand dismissively. “I’ll get some sleep, don’t you worry.” That was about as good an answer as Keith was going to get, so he just sighed and left the room.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~

 

That night, Lance was true to his word and was getting ready for bed. Sometimes, on quiet nights, Keith would sneak into Lance’s quarters and sleep with him. As he was captain, Lance’s quarters were separated from the rest of the crew. His quarters were also more or less connected to his cabin office, so he could just move in-between rooms. There was a door separating them, and that was all Lance needed. It was that door now that Keith slipped through. It was late at night, and the ship was silent. The only sounds, really, were of the sea and the ship creaking as it rode the waves. It was peaceful. “Good evening, captain,” Keith said softly.

 

Lance turned around, a gentle smile on his face. “You know it’s just Lance.”

  
“I know. How are you feeling?”

 

“I’m okay.” Keith stepped closer to Lance, leaned up and pressed a gentle kiss to the very side of his mouth.

 

“That’s good,” Keith said softly, grabbing Lance’s wrist and gently pulling him closer for a hug. A hug which Lance melted into, resting his head on the other’s shoulder. Sometimes, Lance really did need a break. From being a pirate, yes, but more so from being the strongest person on the ship. From being in charge and on top of the game. It was hard, and Lance had to do it 24/7. “Let’s get some sleep, baby,” he whispered, gently carding his fingers through Lance’s hair. Lance nodded and they went over to the bed. The captain’s quarters were the only room on the ship with an actual  _ bed _ , the rest just had cots and hammocks. It wasn’t a very comfortable bed, but it was a bed nonetheless. Being captain has its perks, alright?

 

Lance and Keith got into bed and pulled the covers over them. Keith cuddled up to him, wrapping his arms around him and burying his face into Lance’s shoulder. It wasn’t necessarily the most comfortable position to sleep in ever, but they’d live. Lance had his arms around Keith as well and their legs were tangled together. Slowly, they drifted off to sleep.

 

_ Weakness wasn’t accepted in Lance’s family. Especially not crying. Lance’s dad hated crying more than anything. Almost more than he hated his own children. He had 8 of them. Lance was the second child, eldest son. He was supposed to be the favorite, as he was being trained every day to be captain. He fit all the criteria to be a good one, but there was one problem. He cried too much. His siblings hardly ever cried as children, but Lance did. He was punished quite a lot for it. One such occasion was when he was 6. He had been stabbed. It wasn’t a fatal wound, but it was in his side, and it hurt. It had been tightly bandaged up, and Lance knew that he was going to be fine. But he couldn’t stop the tears. He had only been wounded because his father had tossed him a sword and told him to spar with him, right there on deck. _

 

_ It had been an unfair battle, a grown man against a small child, and Lance had told him so. “Lance, your enemies aren’t going to be fair. They won’t care about the odds. They won’t go easy on you. What makes you think I will too?” was what his father said. _

 

_ After the fight, and after Lance’s sniffling had finally stopped, Captain McClain sent him down to the brig. Lance hated going down there, but he had to a lot. He was locked in a tiny cell for two whole nights without food, and came down near the end of his punishment. Lance tried to speak first, and that was his first mistake. “Father-” _

 

_ Captain McClain’s hand slapped Lance hard, his ring cutting Lance’s cheek. “You don’t call me that, boy! This is exactly the kind of behavior that your enemies are going to look for when they strike you down. You’re just making it easier for them. You’ll never be a good captain, Lance.” Somehow in the process of talking, the captain had removed his belt. Before Lance could even open his mouth to speak, the belt came swinging down. Adding injury to the insult. _

 

Lance’s eyes snapped open and he sat up quickly. His chest, covered with the scars of his past was heaving. He happened to glance down and saw Keith, still fast asleep. Lance took a deep breath. The walls of his quarters felt like they were closing in on him, he couldn’t stay in here. He silently untangled himself from Keith, praying he didn’t wake him up. He seemed to be quite lucky about that, as Keith merely snuggled a pillow instead. Lance threw on some pants, and a loose shirt and made his way out on deck.

 

The air was cold, and the salty sea spray stung his face, but Lance could care less. He sighed and gripped the railing so tightly his knuckles turned white. He squeezed his eyes shut and slowly began to calm down. He hated getting nightmares, especially from his child. He was out there for a few minutes before he heard the familiar padding of feet on the deck and a pair of strong arms loosely wrapped around him from behind. Lance tensed slightly. “You okay?” Keith asked gently.

 

“I’m fine,” Lance muttered, not opening his eyes yet. One of Keith’s hands gently slid up Lance’s shirt, resting softly on the skin of his stomach and he pressed a gentle kiss to his shoulder blade.

 

“Why are you out here, Lance?”

  
“I had a bad dream,” he admitted after a moment, finally opening his eyes. He felt Keith shiver slightly behind him and he felt a slight pang of guilt for waking Keith up. “Sorry.”

 

“Why are you sorry, my love? You know I am always here for you. You could have woken me up.”

 

“I didn’t want to disrupt your sleep.” He gently took a hold of Keith’s hand and pressed a small kiss to his inner wrist.

 

“Is this why you never want to sleep?” Keith asked softly. “Because of nightmares.”

 

“It’s part of it,” Lance said, after a moment. He dropped Keith’s wrist.

 

“I won’t make you talk about it, but I’m here for you. Can we go back inside?”

 

“You go on,” Lance said, looking out at the ocean. “It hasn’t been just the sea and I for a while.”

 

“Okay,” Keith said, gently squeezing him. “Don’t freeze out here.”

 

“I won’t.” Keith finally pulled himself away and went back to Lance’s quarters. Lance sighed softly and stared out at the sea, sparing a few glances at the stars. It was going to be a long night.

**Author's Note:**

> hi, yes, this is totally self indulgent, thank you for asking.


End file.
